I did the Pandemic Pivot. This is different from the Shelter Shuffle. The shelter shuffle is some fun my family and I had during lockdown, where I choreographed a dance and forced everyone to participate so that we could film and post for the enjoyment of our friends and family (ok, mostly my mom).
The Pandemic Pivot is a transformative change born from the Covid 19 crisis. Not all that came from this time was negative. There were a number of silver linings - more time with the family, less traffic, more creative solutions that made life work for business and family, and time to step back and reflect on what is important.
Because I had been laid off and my other (new) business of choreographing dances for quinceañeras was on hold due to lockdown, I took the opportunity to do something that I had wanted to do for as long as I could remember. I got certified in life and career coaching. Before taking that plunge, I had already been doing a lot of work on myself just to get to the point where I had the clarity and confidence to finally step into my dream. I had been working on it for years, reading personal development books, listening to podcasts, joining online communities such as Jay Shetty’s Genius Community, and getting one-on-one as well as group coaching.
I had taken myself through a journey, and I had come out on the other side. Now I had this process. I had knowledge of how to get myself out of stuck and find my personal freedom, my personal success - my joy! I wanted to share that knowledge with the world. My mission became to help people get out of stuck--stuck of any kind: stuck in a job you hate, stuck in the wrong career, stuck in an unfulfilling relationship, stuck in terms of your health, or just plain old stuck.
What does it mean to be stuck?
Oftentimes, because life presents us with unexpected twists and turns, we end up reacting to those events and making decisions based on just trying to survive. After years of doing that, you might find yourself in an unexpected spot and wonder how you got there.
You are no longer getting enjoyment from your work, or your relationship, or you are just tired of the routine you have fallen into. You have probably started blaming yourself and/or your partner for things not being what you dreamed they might be.
You are unhappy.
You know you need a change but you don’t know what that is.
You are desperate for a change.
Even though you hate your current routine, you are scared to disrupt it, scared where the chips might fall, scared to fail. The ego keeps you inline and it keeps you in what has become a very uncomfortable comfort zone. Funny, right? But there we stay. For years. For our whole lives.
No more sacrificing my time to help build somebody else’s dream, especially when they don’t appreciate or value you.
No more sacrificing time with my family to do soul-sucking work.
No more allowing my true talents and passions to take the back seat - it’s time to get in the ring!
As I started to emerge from my own metamorphosis, I knew that I was being called to help others do the same. I knew that the world needed healing, and that starts with each individual finding their own joy--their own inner peace. I was going to start with one person, and then watch the positive ripple effect radiate around the world.
From Stuck to Success was born. I was going to document my process, and turn it into an online course that anybody and everybody who was feeling stuck could take. I would figure out the logistics later (see The Nuts and Bolts of Creating My First Online Course). It all started with a look back at how this journey began.
I want to share with you just 5 of the many skills that will take you From Stuck to Success.
In all of my coaching, all of my programs, I always say the same thing. You have to go back to basics - down to the core. What are your core beliefs? What is the story you are telling yourself about yourself? What are your limiting beliefs? What is holding you back?
Sure, you can go out and get a new job or a new relationship, but if you leave the same track playing in the background, you’re going to end up dancing to the same rhythm over and over again. You will find yourself right back where you were again and again and again.
First things first. Change that track. Change your inner dialogue. But in order to change it, you first have to acknowledge it. You need to become aware of your thoughts. You must train yourself to listen to them instead of just experiencing them. Detach from them, as if you are listening to somebody else saying them to you. In the course, you will learn how to recognize your negative thoughts and limiting beliefs as well as replace them with positive thoughts that will serve you and your mission. Instead of your thoughts being roadblocks, they will become catalysts for positive change.
Skill #1 - Transform your thoughts from roadblocks to catalysts.
As you do this, you will see your self-doubt start to shrink as your confidence awakens. This is the beginning of what will be a beautiful transformation. Turn that which does not serve you into something that serves the new you and your mission.
Another very important part of the journey for me was learning how to leave behind some of the baggage that had been weighing me down. This included accessing memories that had caused me pain, trauma, remorse, or regret. I decided that it was time to stop allowing these memories to continue to affect me in a negative way. Of course they don’t just disappear because I want them to; they will always be there. But I can take control of how they affect me.
I learned a lot about perspective in my journey: how we experience things, how we remember things, what we take away from any given experience. It is all a matter of perspective, and it can always be shifted. How we chose to experience something, how we chose to feel about it - none of it is set in stone. It can be changed, and it is only a matter of making that decision. You can choose whether you want that memory to tear you down or lift you up. The bottom line is, there is always a different perspective.
Skill #2 - Learn to release the burden and baggage of past experiences through perspective shifts.
Sometimes it is just a matter of acknowledging something and forgiving yourself or others. Other times you can find a different twist--something that was gained from the experience. No matter what, you deserve to be unburdened. We are moving through and removing roadblocks so that nothing stands in your way. And let's be honest. If you’re anything like me, most of what is standing in your way is you. That is why we start within--that is always where the answers are.
Now that we have stripped away some of what has been holding us back--self doubt, limiting beliefs, baggage, bad memories, regrets, and even trauma--we can start rebuilding. This time we are going to navigate our own journey instead of being in survival mode and just reacting to the punches that life throws at us. Now you are in the driver’s seat. We are going to give you the tools you need in order to make important decisions about what you want and what is important to you.
In order to do that, we are going to define your values. You will go through the process of answering some questions. Based on your answers, you will know what your values are or what things are most important to you in life. What will you prioritize? Is it family? Wealth? Accomplishment? Integrity? Respect? Excellence?
The values exercise will help you come up with your list of top values as well as prioritize them. Once you know what they are, you will also learn how to use them as an internal compass that will help you make important life decisions, always making sure that your decision is aligned with your core values.
Why are values important?
If all of the important decisions you make in life are aligned with your top values, you can’t go wrong. If you always make your decisions based on what is important to you, you will ensure that those things--your values--are always present. If it’s family, all of your decisions will be made based on what is best for your family. This compass will never steer you wrong.
Skill #3 - Identify your top core values and learn how to use them as your inner compass.
Your values are just one part of a great three-step decision making process that you will learn in From Stuck to Success. This will help you choose the right path, the right job, the right career, the right partner, and it will always help you prioritize yourself and your dreams.
If you haven’t noticed yet, what we are doing here is building. We start from scratch and we are building from the ground up. From the basic core beliefs, to clearing the slate and making room for growth, to deciding what is important to you, and now we are ready to move forward and really build. We have a solid foundation now, and we are ready to build whatever it is you want.
So what is it that you want?
What does your ideal life look like? Come on, you know you dream about it all the time. You might be afraid to say it, but you sat there a million times and daydreamed about it. Or, if you’re anything like me, you have had a million different versions of your dream life play out on your screen.
It’s time to choose one, and really paint the picture. We will ask you a series of questions to make sure you think of every detail, so that you can paint the picture of what you want your life to look like. All aspects of your life, not just the one that you are looking to change. Where do you live? What do you do for work? Who is with you? What do you look like? And much much more.
Get specific. Think of every detail. Allow yourself to really see yourself as that person. Paint a detailed and colorful picture of your future life. You must have something to work towards. You must be able to visualize it, feel it, hear it, smell it. Use all of your senses, and immerse yourself into that world. It’s ok if your destination ends up being different from your vision. That doesn’t matter. Maybe it even ends up being better in some way. Either way, you’ve got to embark on a journey in order to get there, wherever it ends up being. The alternative is to stay where you are now, which we have already established is not where you want to be.
Skill #4 - Clarify your vision so that you can start moving towards it.
People talk about it in all different ways, but basically clarifying your vision will help you stop feeling lost. How long have you been floating around not sure what your purpose is, or not sure what your passion is? How do I find my purpose? How do I find my passion? Don’t look around for ideas. Don’t ask Google, or search Indeed for job listings. The answer lies within. Just give yourself time to be quiet and listen. And now that we are working on building confidence, you will feel confident enough to answer the call this time.
Now you have a vision. The next step is to define a goal and create a plan. Having a clear vision is great, but it will stay in your head and exist as a daydream if there are no specific goals or a plan to get you there.
First you will define a specific goal that you want to work towards. This is not your vision, but a goal that will help you get closer to that vision. It could be anything: a new job, a career change, starting a business, weight loss, a home improvement project, or running a marathon. Anything and everything qualifies.
Once you have specified your goal, we will work on the planning stage. You will take your goal through the SMART planning process which means that you make sure your goal is specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely. This process will help you take something from the idea stage, or the stratosphere, right down to reality and make it that much easier to put your plan into place.
Skill #5 - Define your goal and create a plan to achieve it.
At this point, not only do you have a clear direction and the confidence to walk that path. You also have a plan that you can follow on a daily basis in order to get you there.
You have gone from feeling stuck and losing hope to finding success and seeing possibilities. You will have redefined success and how you experience it on a day to day basis.
These are just five of the many skills that you will pick up along the way in From Stuck to Success.
This course is about making a much needed change in your life. I know that this change has been a long time coming for you. I know that you have been stuck for a while now. That is why I have provided this step by step guide - this structure - that you can use in order to build your new reality.
That is exactly what you will do - build.
You will throw out the old limiting beliefs and thoughts that don’t serve you and replace them with positive thoughts and affirmations that push you towards reaching your potential.
You will ditch the old habits that don’t serve you and replace them, one by one, with success habits that help you execute your plan and reach your goal.
All you have to do is follow the steps. No more wondering what to do or where to turn.
Commit to yourself.
Commit just 15 minutes a day - maybe even less - but if you knew that you could drastically change your life in just 15 minutes a day, would you do it?
Commit to your dreams.
It’s never too late.
Don’t settle for that uncomfortable comfortable zone anymore. It’s time to shake things up and make room for joy, excitement, and endless possibilities.